(JOHN GOTTMAN:) I look at relationships. What’s different about what I do, compared with most psychologists, is that for me the relationship is the unit, rather than the person. What I focus on is a very ephemeral thing, which is what happens between people when they interact. It’s not either person, it’s something that happens when they’re together. It is like a structure that they’re building by the way they interact. And I think of it that way, almost like a fleeting architectural fluid form that people are creating as they talk to each other, as they smile, as they move.
So Gottman too! The relationship is the unit, the locus of the therapy not the individual people.
I expect a heap of posts will automatically appear below so no need to say more!
Later But they didn’t, not as I expected. This quote is related to an earlier post of mine: http://psyberspace.walterlogeman.com/2010/people-myth/