Get a grip on a few things

I will be conducting a personal development weekend beginning the evening of Friday 26 to Sunday 28 April 2019

This is a great opportunity to take a new step in your personal development.  This will be a time to attend fully and deeply to what is important to you.  If you come as a couple, attend to your relationship in a supportive group. The workshop will help you focus, break through blocks, incubate new plans, make promises to yourself.

I have been conducting these weekend workshops regularly for the past few years and I’m looking forward to this one, I expect it will be a special, productive experience. See below for more details and a link to the flyer. I hope to see you aboard!

That was the email I just sent out,  I like the subject line!  It is not quite a USP — I don’t have that yet.  Maybe there is a need for a USP and then these occasional evocative lines.  What would a copy writer say?

Here is the link to the flyer.

 

Shane Birkel interviews Laura Heck – Gottman approach

I’m listening to Shane Birkel interview Laura Heck.

017: Using Gottman Interventions to Enhance Intimacy with Laura Heck

[You can listen to all Shane’s podcasts on your phone if you have a podcast  app.  Search forThe Couple Therapists Couch.  I use Pocket Casts.]

Laura’s own podcast

I wanted to jot down some bullet points so thought – blog, why not.

Continue reading “Shane Birkel interviews Laura Heck – Gottman approach”

Elliott Connie – Goals and Outcomes video

I found this video by Elliott Connie useful! Elliott is a Solution Focussed Couple therapist.

Bud, a psychodrama colleague recommended the video, on Shane Birkel’s  Facebook page.

Here a a bit of Bud’s summary:

… the vital importance of the difference between a goal for therapy and a desired outcome. He discuses it in the context of working with a couple who appeared to have mutually opposing or exclusive goals.

What a simple idea, and perhaps something we already know in an illusive way.  Elliott’s teaching and examples in the video are just excellent.

$1,000,000 = Goal

Peace of mind = Outcome

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Gets me thinking… he is showing us an example of assisting people to deeper into their being and sharing more.  I like the SF questions.

I wonder if couples themselves using the universal space opening question: “Is there more?”  would go from the goal to the outcome?

That way couple can do their own deep listening, with one question:  Is there more? 

This can be done – partner to partner.  If they succeed they may get more confidence and hope for their relationship.

If they don’t… it is good for the therapist to have SFT at the ready.

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Do watch & listen to the video!

 

The Map is not the Territory

Structural Differential — Alfred Korzybski.

 

Podcast

#278: Tim O’Reilly – The Trend Spotter The Tim Ferriss Show podcast

Transcript

Tim O’Reilly: Let me go back to George Simon because a lot of what he taught was a kind of mental discipline that was rooted in a model of how consciousness happens. It was framed somewhat in the language of Alfred Korzybski’s general semantics. Korzybski drew this wonderful diagram – it was actually a tool he used to train people – that he called the structural differential.

Korzybski’s fundamental idea was that people are stuck in language, but language is about something. And so, he represented what he called the process of abstraction so that people could ask themselves, “Where am I in that process?” So, the first part of the structural differential was a parabola, and the reason why it was a parabola is because reality is infinite, but we can’t take in all of reality.

And so, hanging from the parabola was a circle, and the circle was our experience, which is our first abstraction from reality. And then, hanging from the circle are a bunch of label-shaped tags – multiple strings of them – and these are the words that we use to describe our experience.

Korzybski’s training was for people to recognize when they were in the words, when they were in the experience, and when they were open to the reality. George mixed that in with this work of Sri Aurobindo, who was an Indian sage, and had come up with a model that integrated a spiritual view of this, and a practice which was just listening and being open to the unknown.